O.K. Hunter, Start Your Approach
But be aware that as you walk toward her, she will learn a lot about you from your body language. Women are wired with this ability to read approaching men's body language. By the time you reach her, she will have decided to either receive you as a possible friend or reject you as a problem guy.
So use your best body language and walk slowly and straight, with as little extraneous body movements as possible. Walk confidently and casually directly to her. Your body language should say, "I am a live, healthy and strong man. I am confident of myself. I am interested in you. I won't hurt you." Think these words as you approach her and they will help produce the right body language. She knows it takes courage to approach her because at any moment she could reject and embarrass you. She will admire, appreciate and reward your courage and confidence to be brave and take a risk! You will be demonstrating your Alpha Maleness and she will like that!
As you walk toward her, don't look around the room! Look continuously at her eyes. (And don't check out her breasts. You may do that later.) Imagine that there are only you two in the room and imagine that you are saying and meaning: "I like you and I am eager to talk with you. Thank you for inviting me to meet you." As you approach her, give her a soft friendly smile that says, "I am happy to meet you." (That should be easy because you really are happy to meet her!) Keep in mind that she came there to meet someone and here you are! She probably is really pleased that you have selected her above all the other women there. You are her hero! Walk up to her confidently and proudly!
Approach With Strong and Respectful Body Language
As you approach her, don't blast into her personal space like you are attacking. Go slowly and gently. Stand tall and move slowly and confidently. She is watching you like a hawk to see if you are going to try to go where you are not invited. That is what men are frequently trying to do with women, so women are very alert to it and defensive on the subject. Let her see that you only go as far as she invites you. Stand or sit erect with your gut sucked in, shoulders back, chest out and head held erect. You are the Alpha Male here, so look like it! She will really like that. When she feels she can trust you, she will send body language cues for you to come closer.
Make Your "Opening Line" Simple, Direct, and Honest
Don't worry about creating a clever opening line. She knows that you want to talk to her so just say, "Hi! My name is (real name). May I talk with you?" (Notice it is "with you" not "to you", like she must only listen.) Most likely her answer will be, "Yes" because you made it easy for her to respond in a positive way. Your opening line is also very direct and honest so that early-on it tells her you are mature and well socialized. You have no games going on. That greatly reduces the stress at this moment for both of you. Besides, she is too busy reading your nonverbal body language to deal with any opening-line complex statements or questions from you. Just be honest and say that you would like to get to know her and for her to get to know you. She may extend her hand to shake your hand. Background Learn More . . .
Settle Into Her Space Confidently and Carefully
When standing or sitting in front of her, be sure to face her squarely. This means your face, chest and hips are facing her directly. This facilitates a feeling of trust and friendliness. And one more precaution: Never ever touch her unless she invites you, such as her extending her hand for a handshake. Be very respectful of her space and time. Keep in mind that she has the power here to reject you publicly and make you look like a predatory sleaze-ball, scumbag, scourge-of-the-earth. Be grateful if she doesn't! Background Learn More . . .
Start a Friendly Conversation With Her
Your next step is to talk with her to gather data and determine if you both have some common ground that you can share. Stay away from discussions of weather, news, politics and impersonal stuff. What you are really interested in, is if you two have a good chance for long term compatibility -- or at least some fun together for a short time. Finding and sharing common personal interests will bring you both closer together fast. But this verbal communication process is more difficult than it appears. This is the point at which the connection between you both can abruptly break off. This may not be news to you: Women don't think like men! Therefore, to make the best impression on her, you need to talk differently to her than you do to your men friends. Research Learn More . . .
As you search for common interests, keep your attention focused on her, keep the conversation lively and humorous. Humor is important and will establish your intention to have a meaningful, fun, on-going relationship with her. Research Learn More . . .
OK, if she has been friendly and shares some common interests with you -- and not turned out to be a "bimbo air-head", or worse -- you are ready to move on to Step 3.
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Step 2 (You are here.) |
Go to Step 3 | Step 4 | Step 5 |
